Thursday, March 16, 2006

If you want to find me ...

I'll be at the gym. I have mostly finalized my spring schedule and here is what it looks like:
Monday: yoga
Tuesday: training session
Wednesday: drop in step class & pilates
Thursday: training session/hardcore cardo & buns/bellies class
Plus I try to go to the gym on Saturday & Sunday to do a drop in class or my own workout (but honestly even after a year and a half I am still a little scared of Solo Gym Time)

The good news is that each class works a different area of my body so it is at least a well rounded schedule. Plus I am starting to meet people AND not hate how my body looks in the mirror.

I honestly can't believe how much I enjoy the whole gym thing. Definitely when I started it was partially because I had a crush on a boy but it didn't take long for my gym time to become way more than that. I'm learning about my body and how it functions and it is fascinating in a weird sort of way. Frustrating sometimes because my balance can still be sucky and my scoliosis sometimes interferes with some of the shoulder exercises and I am still not great at squats. But every day I get better and stronger and faster and I feel like I am accomplishing something. Maybe I will never run a marathon or participate in a triathalon but I feel like I could if I wanted to and trained hard enough. (Except for maybe the swimming part because I have always had a problem with the proper breathing technique.)

And the whole body image ... I can't even begin to explain how huge that is for me.

Thursday, March 09, 2006

No surprises here

My poor girl B. She hurt her foot in a dance class back before Christmas and despite staying off it (mostly :p) and doing intense physio and all that other jazz it still hasn't healed properly. They finally referred her to a sports doctor who put her in a boot cast (3 months later!) and is referring her to an orthopaedic surgeon. Not exactly the news she wanted to hear, but at least now things will hopefully start to mend.

In other news, I kind of went on a coffee date on Monday. Which everyone seems to know about without me actually informing them so I'm sure the above is no shocker. I guess I just feel like I should make some sort of reference to it before the rumors get thoroughly out of hand because it was just a date. In fact to be even more specific, it was just 2 friends hanging out. We had coffee. We talked. End of story. And I mean, it was nice, don't get me wrong. It was good to hang out with someone I didn't really know and who I think is pretty cute and feel like I was making a decent impression. It was nice to not feel like I should have been prettier or smarter or more interesting or less talkative or whatever. For me, there were a lot of positive things that came out of the experience. But anyone who was expecting the beginnings of some epic romance is going to be sorely disappointed. Thankfully, for once in my life, I am not in that group ... in fact I think things went exactly the way they needed to. I still have a lot of stuff to work out. Again. Some more. And I look at that date and it shows me how much progress I have actually made and it makes me feel good about myself and it gives me some hope that more things will start falling into place and my life will start to mirror my vague envisionings of how it should be. So even though B says I need to move on from some stuff I am not quite ready to let go of and even though I know I need to move on ... well even though they are teeny tiny steps I have taken they are finally steps in the right direction. Whatever that actually means. I'm sure I'll figure it out.

Friday, March 03, 2006

My secret

I really like Kraft Dinner. It's almost obscene how much I like Kraft Dinner (or, to switch things up, noodles with Cheez Whiz). Talk about probably one of the least nutritive things you could ever eat - although lately they have been advertising it as a high source of iron and calcium. Or something. And that flourescent orange powder. Logically it should be digusting. And yet there are some days when I really feel like I could eat Kraft Dinner all day every day.

Wednesday, March 01, 2006

Handle with Care

I don't know how to write about this without sounding totally morbid .. but I am pretty sure my neighbour died last night. Something woke me up around 1 am and I looked out the window to see my dad shovelling the walks and an ambulance across the street. It all seemed so surreal, one minute I was sure it was an ambulance, the next a moving truck, the next not even positive that I had seen a vehicle at all, so I thought that maybe it was just a dream. But when I asked my mom this morning if I had really seen my dad out shovelling the walks in the wee hours she confirmed my initial suspicions. And it makes me a little sad, even though we had just received the news that his cancer was spreading. I lived across the street from him for almost my entire life. It goes without saying that my thoughts are with his family today. As well as with my "big sister" P's family because they have been struggling with the illness of her oldest son since mid-January and no matter what the outcome their lives are forever changed by the events of the last couple of months. It's like whatJo said the other day: Life is fragile and unpredictable.